Meeting SRK – Ra.One Premiere at London

Yayy! I met SHAHRUKH KHAN!!! Spoke to him!!!

Okay starting like sane people would, I attended my first world premiere for a film and that too a SHAHRUKH KHAN film! To be honest, I don’t think I would have taken the effort I did if it wasn’t a SRK film. I met the man spoke to him – a childhood dream come true.

Let me start from the beginning and give you the feel of exactly what happened. Two of my other SRK crazy friends and me decided to go to the red carpet event of Ra.One in London just to get a glimpse of SRK. We had no clue how these things worked or how crowded it is or anything of the sort. We just wanted to see SRK, get an autograph and if we got very very lucky a picture with the Raj and Rahul of our dreams. No one really can pull off the Kkkiran or the romantic scenes and gestures that he does. I bet if anyone else does it they would look like a jackass but when King Khan does it, its romantic its WOW and you just end up dreaming about a Raj or Rahul yet again.

On October the 25th, we friends snuck out of work early just to the venue before it gets too crowded. That morning I wanted to know exactly what SRK was tweeting to have a clue about when would be the best time to leave and where would it be most likely to get that little extra time for an autograph or a photograph. I had forgotten my twitter account details but just to feel connected to SRK reactivated them the same morning. Usually the process of going to work isn’t exactly exciting but that morning I was in the best possible state of mind humming only and only SRK songs (mainly chammak challo and dildara). Happily went to office waiting for end of day (or close to end of day) to leave and go to SRK! Man! even saying it now after a couple of weeks feels amazing!

One of my friends (lets call her A) managed to leave work extremely early so my other friend (lets call her D) and me left a little later and decided to catch up with A at North Greenwich (the place where the premiere was). Throughout our journey we kept refreshing our twitter feeds just to see if SRK had tweeted dropping any hits about his whereabouts but no luck. Halfway through the journey D and me realized we did not have a paper or a pen to get the autograph we had been dreaming about! We started fishing for paper and pens hoping on the way back we would have SRKs autograph on it. Yes, we plan for the best )))

On reaching North Greenwich, D and me were hopping and jumping through the platforms and escalators to put in our best efforts to reach before SRK enters. Anyway, after all the hopping and jumping we called up A for a status update on the Red Carpet glitterati but it turned out to be the most depressing call of the day. We were told there is no point even going to the venue (which we had already arrived at) because there was too much security and only people with tickets were being permitted.

D and me decided to go ahead try our luck. At the venue, three of us spoke to the security tried every way of getting to the red carpet but all we came across was security, security and more security. After this ‘A’ decided it was a lost cause and headed home. A little later we discovered that the tickets were by invite only. We started wondering how non-filmy software engineers would ever get invites to premieres. We started thinking, if not this Don2 we mussst somehow get tickets. Disheartened and disappointed all of us tweeted to SRK telling him we were out and asking him how people got invites . Either ways, we decided to wait out in the cold JUST in case SRK had checked his twitter and decided to surprise us by coming out to the barricade and waving out to us.

We were almost 2hours in and had no luck whatsoever. We looked at the people with tickets who were entering and started taking wild guesses on how they would have got invites and tried calculating in our heads if we could do any of that just if it got us the passes. Soon we just gave up on coming up with absolutely flawed theories. Our hopes of meeting SRK were starting to seem slim.I put my hand in the pocket just to find the paper and pen I had kept in the most accessible place to not miss that splinter of an opportunity for an autograph. By the looks of it, I wasn’t going to need those after all. Sigh! That feeling of being sooo close yet so far just made matters worse for us. D and me kept wondering if leaving work sooner somehow would have helped us to get beyond the barricade.

We were those two disappointed girls at the barricade who were jealously eyeing anyone who came with a ticket and were discussing SRK movies to feel better at that moment. Just then a gentleman in a black satin suit walks up to us asking us if we wanted a ticket to the premiere. We were like ‘Duh! Yes’ who would have thought he was serious, at least we dint. And the next moment he takes and envelope out of his coat pocket. Seeing the envelope my happiness knew no bounds. <Background score: Dekha jo tujhe yaar dil mein baji guitar!!!>But we later saw that he only had ONE spare ticket. Aadmi do aur ticket ek?? Bahut nainsaafi hai <Gabbar style>

In an even more muddling situation we decided to ask the security if both of us could take turns to go inside so that only either of us is inside at once. But as expected they said NO! We dint want to waste the ticket but we couldn’t do this either. We both knew we both wanted it badly so whoever went in wouldn’t come out guilt-free. By now D was starting to lose it and started walking up and down hoping for the heavens to give us another pass or something. Meanwhile, I noticed a not-so-motivated white man standing with a bundle of tickets. I randomly walked up to him and asked, “Would you by any chance have a spare ticket?”. Now I had NEVER seen this coming, but the response was – “As a matter of chance I do”!!!!!!!!! YAYYYYYYYY. To be honest, I only walked upto the man so that I couldn’t look back at the whole thing and later say, what if I had asked someone. And that bit changed the whole thing for me.

At this point there were so many things along the same lines which were coming to me. Two of those were from Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret and Paulo Coehlo’s The Alchemist. I would like to quote The Alchemist here – “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”. It started to make so much more sense. I was starting to think about how many things I have wanted soooo badly. Couldn’t think of too many to be honest. What a pity! One thing I learnt that moment is start wanting things realll bad and do everything possible for it. It feels bloooody awesome when you get something after wanting it so badly. Anyway, getting back to the other thing that came to my mind. Being the filmy soul that I am I thought of the OSO dialogue:
” Itni shiddat se maine tumhe paane ki koshish ki hai ki har zarre ne mujhe tumse milane ki koshish ki hai,
  Kehte hai agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaaho toh poori kaynath tumhein usse milane ki koshish mein lag jaati hai.”
Just to let you know, I am as filmy as they come

After getting past the barricades, D and me we soo exhilarated that walking just dint seem enough. We actually RAN to the red carpet but on the way our very dear friends the security people stopped us there also and asked us to slow down! We thought we would be directed to the theatres or something but we did not realize until then that we would be walking on the same red carpet that king khan would be gracing shortly afterwards… Our excitement knew no bounds!!! Just then we both looked at each other and at the other people on the red carpet to realize we were the most under dressed souls around! We were in formal office wear (black pants and full sleeves white shirt) while people around us were in lovely gowns and all decked up.

After this yet again, we tried speaking to the security to somehow get permission to be around the red carpet we did not really want to watch the movie then and there. We could always do that later during the weekend but getting a glimpse of SRK wouldn’t be possible later. By now it would be no surprise to you that the security said a big NO yet again! And we were shooed away to the theatres. We were told that the team would be visiting each theatre where the movie was being premiered but I thought they were just plain exaggerating just to get us out of their hair.

In a hurry to leave office and get to SRK, we had not bought any snacks (which was an essential part of the initial plan). Starving I decided to buy the standard Nachos that you get in Cineworld. Just reached the lobby area to find a glass wall overlooking the red carpet. That instant, yet again in the day my hunger just disappeared! Tried to get a glimpse of SRK from there. Unfortunately for me, I am short sighted and had forgotten my glasses (which is nothing out of the ordinary). But the whole excitement of watching the gliterrati of the red carpet just roll by while I eat Nachos sounded too pathetic. So I stood there among the other excited fans who unlike me had proper vision and so they would do the spotting and identification of stars and I would TRY to see them with my lovely short-sighted vision

In this whole process, I realized Kareena Kapoor was the easiest to spot as she was wearing the shiniest silver sequin dress known to humankind. With all the lights and the flashes, it was wayyy to easy to spot her. But honestly I dint really care for anyone but SRK! From Kareena’s costume, it seemed to me that she had taken the whole video game theme wayyyy too seriously. I would have to mention that Arjun Rampal looked very dashing as well. I am not a Arjun Rampal fan but I think the whole tattooed Ra.One look was pretty awesome on him.

Anyway, after that yet again the Ra.One of this store the Security came again to shoo us into the theatre halls. We were promised that the team would be visiting. I had never seen  or met SRK before so the whole thought of him being so close was amaziiinnng! And luckily for me I was in the 3rd row. I shouted out to him asking him to come back for Don2 and he even responded. Dont ask me what… I was too blanked out to understand <Background Score – Tujhe dekha toh yeh jaana > . Either ways, on his way out I asked him for an autograph and he said “A little later darling, in a hurry now”  <Background Score – Aankhon mein teri ajab si ajab si>. I was already on cloud no.9 then I was addressed 1 on 1, so it dint feel too bad that I dint get an autograph. To be fair he said “little later” it would be interesting to see when that “little later” is but I am not worried because Picture abhi baaki hai mere dost.

PS: Sorry for the bad picture quality of the premiere pics. Those were taken from my phone and clicked by a hyper ventilating me.
Other pics of SRK that you see here are my all time favourites (which I got by taking the screenshots of the videos at JUST the right moment ) hope you like them too.

India and Regional Stereotypes

Trying to distinguish between those that aiyyo,aielee, amma, eesshh. Be it a chai party or kitty party or a high society gathering, regional stereotypes is very often the topic of discussion. Stereotyping isn’t great and is amusing when some people get offended with these… Please proceed only if you belong to those class of people who can laugh at themselves.

Tamilian: A Tamilian Anna is:

• Often pictured as the brainy serious person who excels at academics

• Loves his carnatic music and quizes his friends and family on the raga’s of a song on hearing it

• one who is asked to sing songs for any and every family gathering ‘oru paatu paadein’

• an ardent religion follower with photos of God staring down from every possible wall in the house

• Cannot get over idolizing Jayalalitha and Rajnikanth

• Hates Hindi

• Often look jaundiced. No they do not suffer from any health issues. They are just beauty concious and love to use their turmeric face pack in excess.

• someone who doesn’t like women to be size 0 in fact, they like them a little (or a little more than) plump. Thunder Thigh Rambha would sure be an example of this. Most actors belonging to this industry would easily be XL or XXL. Apart from this the hero in their movies can single handedly fight 20 bad guys and still save the girl!

Punjabi: A Punjabi is often pictured to be:

• with a dhol doing his signature ‘balle balle’

• over the top and excited

• the funny one and one who laughs the loudest

• drinking uncontrollably

• gauges how good a wedding party is by the amount and quality of alcohol being served ONLY

• love ghyo (a punju term for ghee ), lassi and pronthe (paranthas)

• have a lot of ‘teri toh …‘s in his dictionary

• screaming ‘chak de phatte’  out of ecstasy

• fierce and brave. Thus the unsurprising large number of Punjabi’s in the army

• extremely hard working and do not shun away from doing menial jobs

• the jaan and shaan of a gathering always

• food lovers and a large percentage of obese people in the country would belong to this category

• the kind who overdo make-up

• The kind who love to have some awesome shawsome type rhyming usages

Malayali: A Mallu chettan:

• loves coconuts and has it on his plate, on his head, on the sink (to do vessels with the chagrin), in the fireplace and everywhere possible

• just cant do without rice and needs a mid day meal having rice. Due to its presence in every household at any given point in time, mallus (Malayali’s) have discovered alternate uses of rice. I have even seen it being used as glue! (You already have an answer to the standard interview question which says ‘Give me few non-conventional uses of blah. If the blah is rice, we have hit the jackpot!)

• doesn’t use shampoos very often. The common/healthy practice is to pluck certain leaves and flowers and use the soaked water to wash hair

• man is that typical mooch (moustache) man you have read about or seen

• can be found anywhere and everywhere.There is a popular saying, “You dont meet mallus they just happen to you”

• is one who shops for ONLY two things (esp. in mallu land) – sarees and gold

• is obsessed with fairness creams and powders

• loves his lungis for various reasons…1. when getting bored u can fold it, undo it, redo it and all in public… 2. makes scratching easy 3. facilitates unrestricted ventilation due to reason 1.

• When it comes to movies here, I think they are very similar to their Tamil counterparts with the difference being, the hero here would first fold his lungi ( while the bad guys stand and watch) and  fight a whole battalion of bad guys alone and save the girl! The hero is in short a lungi clad superman!

Kerala fact-sheet: half or more than half malayali’s are NRIs settled in ‘DuFai‘ or ‘GElf‘. They louve to catch the ootoo (auto) by ccch-ccch‘ing it (a way of calling any and every random person and we thought call signals only existed in the animal world!). This state has 100% literacy but no they still don’t believe in working… They believe in strikes. Which turns out to be a blessing when you are in school or college. Who doesn’t like extra holidays?!

Gujrati: A Gujju bhai:

• is known to be stingy

• is the businessman of India

• is a vegetarian

• likes everything sweet including their dal (lentil soup) !

• has a taste for shiny/sparkly clothes

• is exaggerative

• calls every one baain (behn)

• loves to speak in english. Errrrm his version of it, where Pop is Pope, Hall is Hole. These variations of the language can at times result in ridiculously hilarious meanings. Try permutations with the above words and be creative. You would know what I mean!

• look for a reason to perform (sing/dance). This reminds me of that scene in Kal ho na ho… right before the song Mahi Ve. Can be fun (to the extent of being lame! ;P watch KHNH for further reference ) . Even the most obese oldie gujjus can put those fit gymming youngsters to shame with their garba and dandiya moves.

Bengali: The Bengali Babu and Boudi

• love feesh (Fish) in a spicy jhol curry

• love their mustard in every form… you name it, they use it!

• uses mustard oil for cold, earache, cough, etc. It is the Bong panacea.

• have shrill voices and can be heard a couple of houses away owing to their habit to speak errm softly.

• obsess wearing bindi and the rule says, the bigger the better.

• like everything colourful from their houses to their clothes.

Bengali fact sheet: They are the true artists of India.  Most of out actors, musicians, poets hail from there. They are known for their flawless beauty and beautiful skin. Other than this a rule that applies to the Bong English is that ’a’ and ‘o’ are equivalent. This means that Office is Affice, Mahima is Mohima, West Bengal is ‘Waste Bengal’  or ‘Bhaste Bengal’ and Veg is ‘Bhaej’.

UP waala’s :

A UP waale bhaiya is extremely hard to spot and classify. They come in different packages. One variety would be the paan eating ‘Kya kahat hain babua?’ types while another contrasting variety would be those ‘pehle aap‘ Lucknow Nawabs. The UP waalas are found all over India and claim to be the hindustani’s which is what makes them hard to distinguish. Cant decide which part of India a person belongs to? Must be a UP waale bhaiya.

On a personal note, I can relate to 3-4 of the categories mentioned above as my family has representations from the different states in India.

New York Nagaram

I just felt I have to dedicate a post to New York Nagaram from the movie Sillunu oru kadhal!

An awesome song and one of my favorites! Surya is as usual superb!

Here are the lyrics :

mmm.m…mmmm..mmmm [humming]

(ARR)
New York Nagaram urangam neram
==thanimai adarnthathu
paniyum padarthathu
kappal irangiye ==
kaatrum karayil nadanthathu

naangu(4) kannadi suvarkalukule
– naanum meluguvarthy –
thanimai thanimayo..
–kodumai kodumaiyo

[music..]

mm…m..mmm…..mmmm[humming]

(ARR)
New York Nagaram urangam neram
==thanimai adarnthathu
paniyum padarthathu
kappal irangiye ==
kaatrum karayil nadanthathu

naangu kannadi suvarkalukule
– naanum meluguvarthy –
thanimai thanimayo..
–kodumai kodumaiyo

(music…..oh………oh………..oh….)

(ARR)
==pechellam thaalatu pola
ennai uranga vaikka nee illai
thinamum oru muttam thanthu
kaalai coffee koduka nee illai==

vizhyil vizhum thusi thannai
yeduga nee inggu illai
manathil yezhum kuzhappam thannai thirga
nee ingge illai………
naan ingge neeyum angge..
intha thanimai nimishangal
—varusham aanatheno ?

vaan ingge neelam angge
intha uvamaiku iruvarum
—vizhakamanthu yeno ?

oh………oh………..oh…. (humming)

[Female (background)]
New York Nagaram urangam neram
==thanimai adarnthathu
paniyum padarthathu…..

(music…..oh………oh………..oh….)

(ARR)
naat kuribil nooru(100) thadavai
unthan peyarai ezhthum enn penna..
Ezhuthiyathum yerumbu moika.
Peyarum aanathenna then-na…

oh………oh………..oh….(F–humming)

(ARR)
==jillendru bhoomi irunthum
intha tharunathil kulir kaalam
kodai yantheno==

oh………oh………..oh….(F–humming)

(ARR)
naan angge neeyum vanthal
senthanal kuda — panikatti pola maarume

oh………oh………..oh….(F–humming)

[female]
New York Nagaram urangam neram
==thanimai adarnthathu
paniyum padarthathu…..

(ARR)
naangu(4) kannadi
suvarkalukule naanum meluguvarthy
thanimai thanimayo
thanimai thanimayo
kodumai kodumaiyo

ah====yei ====yei=====

FYI the photo’s are of Surya and Jyothika’s daughter Diya…

East Vs West- Dilemma’s of a NRI

I don’t know how this thought came up but I do think it was interesting one…. This is not about why we ape the west or the cliched stuff! It is just about the differences…. That’s why I call it Dilemma’s of a NRI!

Something I have never been able to understand about the way the human mind perceives things is that, why it always plunges to look for differences before discovering similarities? This makes the statement ‘humans are innately social’ sound plausible. If we humans were innately social beings, then wouldn’t we be looking for things that would help me identify with someone instead of the those that don’t? I just don’t seem to understand this!

(FYI, I am a north Indian born and brought up in South) For instance, when I meet someone from the south of India, they call me a North Indian while in the north i am known as a Madrasi. Who am I really? People in the south think I am not one of their kind while people in the north feel the same way. If this is the case in migrating from one part of the country to another, imagine migrating to another country all together! Phew! Another dilemma of a NRI, that which relates to what we love to have a big fat ego about-identity…

Ok, moving on… The next in the list is Arranged vs Love.This may not seem significant to a non-Indian but it makes a world of a difference here in India. Traditionally, a spouse is chosen by the family of the bride/groom. Many non-Indians have appreciated this because even if things dont go your way you always have your family to bank on and you WONT have to have sessions of  ”See… I told you” ‘s… It does remove the risk factor involved but what’s the fun!

Next being Wash Vs Wipe! Some people from the west are completely baffled seeing a bucket and a mug in the restroom and wonder its use while people from rural parts of the country do not get the logic of having paper in the toilet! Such a wide gulf even in following nature’s MOST basic rules…

Buckets Vs showers!
The MIGHTY Indian Bucket is the cynosure yet again! This is a mighty contender of essentials when it comes to the daily Indian routine. Even when it comes to the daily activity of bathing, the bucket makes its presence felt. Quite the contrary most english bathrooms lack this and rely heavily on showers.

Hand Vs Spoon
Coming to eating habits now… The desi Indian would any day prefer eating with their hand rather than using spoons, forks and knives… Even for me hunger is satiated only when I eat with my hand… I am a true DESI at heart!
On the other side, the west beliefs are it is unhygienic!

There are a lot of other differences but I guess I will stop here. If you can come up with any others let me know…